Wake me up when march comes.

2006-03-06T13:56:00.000+08:00

I have moved.
Like a fuckin' virgin is now with wordpress. Decided to go for a neater cleaner, and more organised look. Blogger's starting to look a little childish.

2006-03-03T18:22:00.000+08:00

Octopus me.
I am amazed sometimes how many tasks I try to undertake. Many a times, it gets too overwhelming, I don’t really know how to stop the pressure from coming. Work load’s picking up again, though the past week had been rather quiet. Strangely I prefer to be busy than to be sitting at my seat, thinking to myself how easy and boring things are. Being busy makes me feel I am living my life. Keeps my wandering mind off negative thoughts.

Our mazda 3, Cocaine. Yeah we named it cocaine, as inspired by pat, is taking much too long. I’ve been calling candice our agent so many times, I’m almost so sure that she puts keys in the words “do not pick up” for my number listing in her contact list. LTA was down.. blah blah blah... still doing the bodykit... blah blah blah. Just give me that damn car!! - All that excitement I had is already drained away from all that wait. Fucker.

Design of our new apartment’s done. We sat down one night after a long tiring day of work, and within an hour, we were all done with the choice of colours and materials. We pretty much agreed on everything almost immediately. I’ve never been in a more smooth sailing discussion than this. I once told J, being in construction line...... building the houses of newly weds.... you would already predict how their marriage would end. Morbid. She said I was. But aint it true? You would see how a couple would squabble over even the choice of tile colours, the amount of respect they give to each other, even in front of a stranger, how smart each spouse is, and who is predominantly domineering over the other, and how they actually stab each other’s ego. oh well. Anyway, we got ours done with nice pretty agreements.

Our son, Rudie, has turned five this year. And I thought he was jus the length of half my arm yesterday. Today he’s that little boy who practically tells you his opinions. And is in love with our neighbour’s mutt, Lisa. He’s a grown boy now.....mama’s gotta learn to accept that. Papa’s amused.

:D

2006-03-02T11:04:00.000+08:00

Rudie : Guilty.

I was in the office, and my handphone beeped with a new MMS coming in. I clicked on it and couldn’t decide whether I should be angry or be laughing at what I saw. here’s the image. Rudie sitting by the car seat. Looking all guilty. Yes J brought him along to send me to work, letting his ears fly against the wind, something he enjoys tremendously. And the next thing we knew, he was shitting on the seat. Boy he’s gonna get a dressing down from J.

2006-03-01T16:11:00.000+08:00

Someone asked me what is my wish for the year
My wish for the year is to find inner peace. I divide the portion into two. One being my relationship. A relationship which I don’t have to spend my time worrying and being upset, but one that allows me to have time to be happy, to have the space to love. I found that. There have been times where I sit there, look at the dinner she cooked for me, and her, me, and our little rudie, in that house, and I think to myself. How happy this scene is.

The other half would be a job that would make me feel the same. A Job that would allow me to express my innerself, and something that I would even for 24 hrs, look up and think to myself, there’s no better job than this for me. If I find that, my life would be complete for now.

It’s been working out between J and me, cause our philosophies in life matched like a pea. We believe in the same things, and are in search for the same things. I enjoy the fact that I no longer have to be arguing in a relationship letting it affect my life in the day. We lay in bed under our duvet watching DVD, and I thank god I have her company. Because there’s peace in my relationship, I am able to find peace with myself.

J, thanks for all the lovely breakfast you made me. Muaks.

2006-03-01T15:39:00.000+08:00

Amy's Birthday Bash, 4 March @ Loof

Email me to find out more.

2006-03-01T15:37:00.000+08:00

Moving out.
When I was 21 I told myself I would one day move out and stay by myself. At age 25, I finally moved out. I moved out not because I was having problems at home, nor was it because I argued with someone at home. All I wanted was a space of my own. Having the freedom to stay in-doors that’s larger than my 200 sq ft room. Being able to go out and come home at my own wish, not having to report. Having my own life, with minimal nagging. There I was, old enough to find my own life, and needed the ability to be given independence that parents sometimes fail to respect.

I had already once moved out at age 22. Lived out for more than a month away from home. And mom missed me, called me home. So when I was away for an entire week at age 25, she did not freak. I came home to tell her I want to move out, and she calmly said, its about time. She helped me pack. She cried. But she gave me her best wishes. So after all the imagination when I was young, in wanting to move out of the house, on the pretext of a fake anger, from an argument didn’t happen. I ended up moving out calmly. There wasn’t a more matured way of handling a move out than this. And I was happy that I moved out on a good note.

Now my mom calls me once in a while telling me she sincerely misses me. And when I am home visiting, my parents never had anything to scold me about anymore. What they can’t see, no longer worries them. I no longer have to spend my nights, assuring them that I would be okie home late. And out of my parent’s imagination, I managed to fit well into the move out life. I cooked, washed, took care of my ownself, like they could never imagine me to be. (nor did I imagine myself to be!)

And coming year, at age 26, I would be in London, a city that’s not exactly the safest, studying and travelling there alone for about 3 weeks, before my J could join me there. I would have to learn to survive life in another way. Turning 26, and looking back at age 21, feels like a long and treacherous road I’ve taken. Life after 21 hadn’t been easy. There were jobs that did not pay me for months. There were jobs that din give me the exposure I had wanted. I took time off work finished off my degree. And there were slumps in the economy, affecting jobs, pays. But well I managed, and halfway to the the door of 30. I’m now 25 turning 26, exhausted. Settling down. Wanting bigger responsibilties, and opportunities.

4 years of working life has driven me nuts enough. I just want a better life.

2006-02-24T18:34:00.000+08:00

LustList

Dolce Gabana for Motorola V3i in Gold

Now we’re talking gold lust!!! Only 1000 pieces made! Motorola, Inc. and Dolce & Gabbana unveiled the limited edition RAZR V3i: a one of a kind collaboration blending Motorola's globally acclaimed RAZR design with Dolce & Gabbana's signature style. The limited edition RAZR V3i also includes rich functionality with a 1.23 mega pixel digital camera, optional expandable memory in the classic RAZR form.

2006-02-24T16:51:00.000+08:00

Disdain me not
Yesterfay was I was inspired to update my profile.

About myself
Juxtapose. Everything of high contrast. I love black. I heart white. There are no greys in my life. I can get awfully obssess with someone or something, allowing myself to lose all sense of proportion. I let my emotions swirl like paper in the wind, and swipe like the tide, going on the highs and the lows. I am foolhardy adventuring and lack of interest in worldly matters. I get strange impulses and desires, and live in my own whimsical land, oblivion to the surroundings. I have a sense of unquencable wanderlust, and have the constant need to seek my own adrenaline boulevard.

I indulge in getting body modifications and getting ineradicably stained skin, in having a constant need to reveal the silent scream within me.

I believe in " learning how to die, in order to understand how to live" ( a quote from Tuesdays with Morrie). I let the pains slowly seep into me, i let it hit my heart, and feel the nervewrecking ache on every bit of my vains, as the blood travels through my body. I let it all well up to bring tears to me eyes, and signal in my head to recognise the entire process of pain. I let my brain tell me i would be find, I close my chapter. Sagar (to close in hebrew). I remember it deeply, Zachor To remember in hebrew). The tears dry up. And i would than be able to disassociate from it.

What I find important in my relationship.
Trust. Faith. i do not have to worry where she's looking at, who she's thinking of, who she's talking to, and where she'll disappear to. A relationship should be well grounded. We should be able to concentrate on communicating, exploring the world together. I no longer want to argue about her looking anywhere else but me.

What turns me on.
A woman being herself. Femininity. A womanly curved body. Confidence. Smell behind the ears, shadow falling on her tattooed body.

2006-02-22T17:59:00.000+08:00

Someone once asked me what was my favourite brand.
I answered Tom Ford for Gucci, but felt it didn’t do justice to the list of designers I like. Some of my favourites in the list would be :

FCUK
Everything from them fits me perfectly. Love their cut, and their quirky choice of fabrics.

DIESEL STYLE LAB / DIESEL
Another brand that would fit me just right. One of the boldest brand with a industrial look apart from Dsquared.

MISS SIXTY
never ending legs. Nuff said.

CALVIN KLEIN
Everything from the man is intmately cut. Fabrics luxurious, with a great choice of earthy gold tones.

CHLOE
Amazing dresses with the best choice and mixes of chiffon and light fabrics. Very very feminine.

LILY JEAN
A brazilian designer, I have two dresses from her, and I love it.

MARC by MARC JACOBS
His name says it all. He’s a walking fashion icon.

FUTURE CLASSICS
interesting , interesting play of geometrical cuts.

STELLA MCARTNEY
Feminine fabrics, amazing choice of feminine colours. Surreal feel. A more wearble version of MCQUEEN.

ALEXANDER MCQUEEN
Love everything by MCQUEEN. Quirky, bold, individual.

2006-02-22T17:21:00.000+08:00

Hey peeps! Cool new place to hang out : Loof
Loof, take a look!

Introduced by Ace.

2006-02-21T17:12:00.000+08:00

Gil, Kerryn and Meg
three Aussies got these tats done a few years ago in Melbourne before all heading off to different parts of the globe.

Kerryn loves Kurt Vonnegut and decided to get "And so it goes" ( a recurring line from Slaughterhouse Five) tattooed on her shoulder.

Finally on the other side of three decades worth of bad shit, Gil decided to get "And so it was" tattooed on her back representing the past that she has moved on from but that made her who she is.

And Meg, the eternal optimist decided to get "And so it will be" on her right arm as a symbol of the beautiful unknown.

We reunited this afternoon for a few brief hours before we were once again claimed by different time zones.

My thoughts : I was doing a research on textual tattoos, and i came about this. Truely think tattoos should be like this. With a story to tell.

2006-02-19T18:31:00.000+08:00

Thoughts : Sunday 19 February, 6.13PM.

Goldfish memory.

We are like goldfishes living in a bowl. The world looks warped, and our memories last us only 6 secs. before we turn our backs and forget what happens. We make a mistake, and we forgot how we made them, what trapped us, and how it has hurt us so deeply. Ignorant to how big the world could be, we swim round and round in our own miseries, and the one track way of life. Immersed underwater, having the water daint our eyes, we are unable to see clearly. Looking out at the sky from the little opening from our tanks, we often blame god and the world, why our world's so small. Bloop Bloop Bloop we go on and on, like goldfishes. Oh where was I just now?.....

- me.

2006-02-19T17:48:00.000+08:00

Enough said aint it?

2006-02-17T14:20:00.000+08:00

Scuba Diving in Bali
Yeah i finally got the images developed.

See more pictures here

2006-02-16T10:58:00.000+08:00

I went to MOS a weekend ago. Everyone has been talking about MOS ever since I opened about almost 2 months ago? And having all the large festive seasons, the queue had been most horrendous. We had passed it on New Year day, and the queue was right up to Riverwalk, we drove off to Zouk of course. So now that all the excitement has died down a bit, we finally swore that we would go in that weekend, after some wine and shabu shabu at home with friends. We drove there, and after we parked the car, our friends who alighted first to join the queue, called to say the queue’s freaking long. Yet in the next split second called and said they ‘accidentally’ cut the queue. Yeah ‘accidentally’. And there were at the beginning of the queue already. We wheezed right in, only to join another queue at counters where you buy the MOS tickets. The counters felt like you were at the Science Centre, buying tickets to enter the Amphitheatre. White, with lots of cyber lights. For a moment we really did feel like tourists. So after we got out goddamn cheap MOS tickets, we heard them saying SMOOVE room is close, cos it’s been fully packed..... FUCK. SO we had to move our ass into the main room.

Main Arena

The Main Arena was dark and huge. High ceilings, double storey. We started touring the place.
The main room was alright. It was HED KANDI that night, so the music’s not too bad. They had a guy singing live as the DJ mixed. But the crowd was horrid to watch from second level. They couldn’t dance. I think 80% of them had no idea who was spinning that night. They were miserably counting their dance steps to keep in tune. And as we sat and observed the crowd, it was all over. Ah bengs, Foreigners, Ah lians, Flamboyant Gays, Nerds, AUNTIES. Gosh. It was MINISTRY OF SOUND alright. Appealing to every tom dick and harry in town.

Tunnel
Headed upstairs, and headed into the first room that says ‘23 years old and above’. Sadly, we all passed, and walked into this white room, that changes colour over time. It was fill with expats, SPGs, and advertising / marketing looking type of people mingling around. The décor was quite nice, the Bed supperclub type of seats and all.

54
Headed riight through the room, to the exit, and went to check out the next room. It was surprisingly the retro room. Why do I say surprisingly? Well, all along, when I bought MOS cds, I had the impression that MINISTRY OF SOUND, was a club that had specialised music. I had thought one room would be trance, one room house, one room RNB. Yet there’s RETRO! GOSH. Walked in, and straightway, and I really mean straightaway, you feel like you are in the WRONG PLACE. Retro like curtains, Glamourous hongkong looking type old man, prancing away at the entrance. Women who looked like they were ‘xiao jies’ from ‘XIN TIAN DI’ were next to the men. It was retro songs going on alright. And the music sounded like a bad KTV room. Yet strangely it was one of the most crowded room. I turned around quickly and lead everyone out.

I think the Taittinger sky lounge and Pure was closed.

Such a fucking disappointment after all that wait.
I think I still prefer the niche zouk. Please all the ugly people who can’t dance adjourn to MOS thanks.

One thing I must comment though, the great designers of Zouk Flyers have gone to MOS. Zouk flyers look so sad right now.

2006-02-15T19:06:00.000+08:00

Car Number Bidding

Land Transport Authority - Bid a Car Number: "IMPORTANT: Bidding for car registration numbers 1 to 9999 in the SGF series will start from 8.00am on 4 February 2006 (Saturday) to 12.00 noon on 11 February 2006 (Saturday). Interested members of the public are invited to submit their bids. The public can check the available numbers and their suffixes at the LTA website at www.lta.gov.sg . Bidders can check the results of the bidding exercise through the One.motoring website at http://www.onemotoring.com.sg from 4.00 pm on 17 February 2006 (Friday)."

I can't wait. GOD PLEASE GIVE US A NICE NUMBER!

2006-02-15T14:57:00.001+08:00

$800, Home-Office room for rent @ Chip Bee Gardens. Terrace House, with front garden and backyard. Wireless Broadband provided. Furnished meeting area available. Air-conditioned. Room space big enough to sit 2-3 comfortably. Prefably graphic or design based business.

Situated in the prestigious District 10 lies a rustic development - Chip Bee Gardens. Set amidst peaceful and serene surroundings, Chip Bee Gardens is your haven from the hectic city lifestyle. The quaint terrace houses of Chip Bee Gardens will transport you back to the enduring charm of a bygone era. Experience its unique tranquility, set against the vibrancy of Holland Village just steps away. Experience a charming village-like community. Take your pick and dine at eating establishments located at the periphery of the estate. Chip Bee Gardens, an estate with a charming mix of the old and the new, is the perfect place to call home.

800 Home Office Room to let at Chip Bee Gardens Holland Village Homes Offices in Singapore @ Adpost.com Classifieds > Singapore > 800 Home Office Room to let at Chip Bee Gardens Holland Village Homes Offices in Singapore,free,classified ad,classified ads

Email me if interested.

2006-02-14T11:20:00.000+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

my dear friends. To all the people in the list, I love you all guys! Pawpaw Jerm, Seven, Sylvia, Michelle, Joel, Christina, Irene, Dot , Amy, Karmy, Joey, Jean, Celia, Ling, Chiky, Ed, Victor, Tommy, Linda... and many more (sorry if I missed you out here). Have a blasting V day!

2006-02-13T17:19:00.000+08:00

Lovenest.

Have I forgotten to mention that we’ve gotten the keys to our lovenest as of 27 of January. We are currently designing the workpad and the living space together. It’s gonna be wootlicious. The cool thing’s that we are gonna have the place all to ourselves, no more tenant as per what we had originally planned. Cos she’s leaving to Shanghai to work. so we’ve decided, to keep the place private, a place for both of us to grow our ideas. Gonna have a bar counter, a open concept working pad, where both of us would share our creative ideas, and store our books. Gonna choose our paint colour, and tiles, pretty excited about it. Special thanks to J for buying the house for us to live in. grin*

2006-02-10T16:09:00.000+08:00

Starry Starry Tree

Would you paint me such lovely picture every night?
(Picture from H1 @ Bangkok)

2006-02-10T15:41:00.000+08:00

We bought a share of the 10 million TOTO, in the office. I put in my share of a small amount of $5 in hope of being a small little Taitai.

Last night we were supposed to watch VCD together, yet suddenly her client called, she went to the office to work, and I waited till I fell asleep. She came back, saw me sleeping, and didn’t bear wake me up...... When I woke up I was surprised to see her by me... and she leaned over, kissed me and whispered, ‘ you are the best’. Puzzled I asked why, and she said, you are the only one who waits and not scold me.....

2006-02-10T11:21:00.000+08:00

perception of love.

Either I am truly 30 as J says she feels I am, or that I have aged terribly over the last few years. My perception of love has changed drastically. To me love has become a factor which should no longer affect me so much to the point that I go to work, and It puts me in a state unable to think, nor to concentrate on my work. Loving that way has been quite an experience for me, but it made the rest of my life come to a stop. I was unable to take steps I could normally take. I was simply dwelling in pain, and upsets.

To me, a relationship should never be arguing about someone else, an external source. Two should spend the time communicating, and if there’s a need for argue, it should only be about the two of us. No one else. I no longer encompass such strength to keep worrying where my partner looks to, where my partner is, who my partner is messaging, apart from me anymore....

It’s time to move on to a more matured level of a relationship now. I don’t enjoy arguing about such matters anymore...I just want someone whom I can hold, watching TV at night. Someone whom share my design and music likes, someone whom I can have quiet nights at home, or crazy party nights out with. I am tired of living the ‘drama coupleship life’.

2006-02-09T13:54:00.000+08:00

Paint me a life.

Days has passed me by weakly, and i'm yearning to be doing something which i would wake up happy everyday. Last night we bought Jay Chou's latest album, and came to a realisation that he's one of those damn lucky fellas, who did what they love, and earned plenty of money from it...Not many of us had been that fortunate in our lives. Some are even unable to define what they truly love to do, and simply flow along with the mass crowd. Somehow those who are ignorant to the existence of fighting for a passion, might be happier, then one who has a strong passion, yet unable to do anything about it, but to take on mundane, commercialised job in order to pay our bills.

No, i've not been lucky enough to be borned in Paris, or any part of France, to be able to explore art, to paint in the worn down covent gardens, and simply be paid by the government social welfare, for being jobless. This trip to Europe, as much as I am afriad, walking around alone, i swear that i would drag myself out on the streets, and absorb as much as i can from them. See eveything i could, take as many pictures as i could, keep my eye out for any opportunities possible.

Working everyday in a well paid enough job, seating and simply waiting hoping for promotion, has made me a girl who's scared of facing the world, who's scared of challenges. I was slowly, unawaringly, falling into the category of someone who sits and simply wishes everything to be peaceful, to be safe, i was slowly eating into the Singaporean mentality. But no, we really should get out ass out, and do something you had never thought you had the guts to do.

2006-02-08T18:56:00.000+08:00

Our COE bidding has been successful!
I checked online for the results, and it showed entered entry at 947am this morning, and after 4 when the bidding closed, it stated that the bidding had been successful! Whoopee! So Candice called us, and informed us of the good news, now we just have to wait patiently for our Vehicle Registration Number, and we'll be picking up our Mazda from the warehouse thereafter! Paid my downpayment for the car, fiddling in my seat, anxious to pick it up. Smiles*

I've also received confirmation on my London Course at Central Saint Martins!
I would be doing two Certificate Short courses at CSM, which is Art Direction, more towards Fashion, and Marketing. I would commence school on the 26 of April, and would be away for 2 month in London. Would be doing a travelling and schooling sabbatical, before i head back for more challenging endeavours. Smiles. I would need accomodation urgently now! Anyone who has any information please let me know!

2006-02-03T19:40:00.000+08:00

Honto ni nihonjin deska?

When i was in Bali, i was standing at Bounty, a local club, and there was a japanese boy standing right in front of me, he eyed me a few times, before he came over, lean against my face, and whispered, 'nihonjin deska?'. Bewildered, i always jus wave my hand, and say no....and when i was shopping at Bangkok, especially places like Chatuchak. I would pick up something, and ask, 'how much?'. They would answer me '800 baht'. Then someone from behind comes over and whispers, 'nihon nihon!' and before i knew it, she says ' 1000 baht'. I've gotten so used to it that, each time i pick up something, i simply say, 'me no nihon, no nihon price please'. And push J in front, while she acts local, understanding a little bit of Thai language.

We were in a cab, and Sylvia was sitting in front, like J, she's pretty tanned, the drive started rattling on and on about the lousy traffic in Thai, while she keeps quiet, totally bewildered. She asks us in chinese doesnt he know she doesnt understand Thai? And we we most amused. The cab driver went on in the background, talking to himself.

What nationality have you been mistaken for?

2006-02-01T19:06:00.000+08:00

BACK FROM TOM YAM LAND. SUFFERING FROM AFTER TUKTUK EFFECTS- Blog Later.

2006-02-01T13:15:00.001+08:00

Retro-Fitted Volkswagen Caddy 1.9 TDI for Sale

Manual, 1896cc, Diesel Engine, Emmaculate condition, retro-fitted, sporty red with white stripes, white vinyl upholstery, selling cheap $23.5k. If interested email me at cykomaniac at hotmail dot com.

2006-01-26T17:30:00.000+08:00

Yesterday both J and I had become proud owners of a White, Mazda 3 RS.

A Luxury version of Mazda 3 sports. Complete with sexy Fog lights, rear spoiler, leather wrap gear stick, leather wrap steering, Black Interior with Black Karbon Leather Seats and Piano Black dashboard paneling, Sporty Side Skirt, Sports Front & Rear Bumper, V shaped front ventilator, Special Sports Leather seat and 17" Alloy rims !

It’s not an expensive car, but it’s sexy enough for the both of us. We have officially signed the papers, and joined the Mazda family. I’ve always been a sucker for the new Mazdas. Beautiful fierce front designs, excellent sporty accessories, and great pickup speed.

Yeah. so you guys know who not to call up for clubbing and late night drinks now. Both of us gotta cut down on our lifestyle to feed the new member in our family. We would await the COE bidding results, in much anticipation! hee. I can’t wait.......

2006-01-23T15:00:00.000+08:00

The case of Lau Po Bing answered.

S was eating the ‘laupo bing’ (biscuit made by wives for their husbands, especially during war time), her gf bought her. And she looked up and asked, why does the biscuit taste so bland. I looked up now, and answered her, cause that’s what marriage is. Bland. It’s speaking the truth.
She laughed, shocked at my reply.

2006-01-23T14:23:00.000+08:00

Cheers, my life.

I’ve been down in bouts of little bad tempers and depression lately. I am a person who hates not seeing the road in front, I am a person who gets frustrated when I feel lost. I’ve been feeling rather lost lately. Career takes up a large part of my life, cause it’s my passion, it’s the reason why I live, and it’s really one of the miserable things I am good at, yet the drifting along is killing me violently.

From the sound of things, I might look like I am a person who never gets contented with my life, my love’s good, my basic material needs are good, I am surviving life well living without my parents, and here I am grumbling at the only down in my life, my job.

She told me, “maybe it’s time to pull out, take a rest, self improve then enter at another stage.”

At the same time, the most important factor of all, my financial bank for my short course, my dad. One of the hardest person to please on earth. My moving out hasn’t made him the most jovial dad on earth. It’s tough making him happy, and knowing I am doing good, in order to get the basic needs to grow slightly more. Keeping him happy has become my part time job. Only just as stressful as my full time job.

This weekend, I learnt two things. Waiting is one of the most torturing things anyone can experience. Sitting there, watching a movie, yet your head’s really counting the ticks and the tocks, attention’s never full, and each time you look up at the clock you are bewildered by how slow time really moves. You fidget around, switches off the DVD player, takes a short nap. Wakes up to the same tick tock on the clock. Only half an hour has passed by......Check your handphone, no messages. Pick up a halfway read book, ends up finishing the book, looks up at the clock. TICK TOCK. Still nothing. By now, each second had already seems to dragged in a warped extension that felt like weeks. Suddenly the 4 hrs felt like I had waited for 4 years. Heart got really heavy, and lips became too dry from having no company. And on that same day, I put myself in the situation of sitting alone out in the cold darkness, waiting for nothing, and understood how miserable the wait can be.....

The second thing I learnt, was that family isn’t really the your pillar of support. As much as we have been brought up to believe so. To believe in maintaining family kinship, to understand the importance of reonion, yet sadly to say, it’s not true. It’s not that we, as the younger generation doesn’t want to see importance in kinship, but the generation before us, has started to make us believe that, they are not the people to go for for help. A millions times my parents has taught me that, family would always be the one who holds me in times of needs, and yet for the millionth time, I saw my friends holding me when I am crashing down, not them.

It’s sad.

Then I remembered asking my first gf, who was six years older than me. She was 25 then, and I was 19. I asked her in a fit of an anger, “ why are you so damn cynical all the time? maybe things aint as you think it is?”.... Now being 25 myself, I understood why she was cynical when I knew her. The realisation of things over time, eats into you slowly.... devouring your beliefs away, no matter how strong you try to be...

2006-01-20T12:57:00.000+08:00

Bintan Trip Photos!

The cheap and crazy getaway!

2006-01-19T16:25:00.000+08:00

Tiger Beer Unveils Fresh, New Look

New Tiger TV Commercial

Tiger's makeover also involves a new advertising campaign, set to crank up the beer's hip and trendy quotient by another notch. Bringing to the fore an inspirational "It's Time" message, the TV commercial starring famous actress, Jessica Alba, makes Tiger Beer the first Singapore brand to be endorsed by a Hollywood celebrity and will start airing on local TV and at the cinemas from 30 October. Jessica Alba was chosen as she embodies the new Tiger spirit of fun and friendship and is a movie star with whom the young and trendy can identify. The TV ad will be complemented by a series of new print and outdoor advertisements, featuring Singapore's favourite beer in the most glamorous bars and pubs around the world, and will be launched to the public from 28 October.

Alright, so you see Jessica Alba up close on our local Television, holding that local beer, gulps it, looks like she wants to vomit, tries hard to swallow it, pauses, before saying give her a new tiger. Well. we are really convinced now aint we?

*looks ard.*
Someone tell me whats up with that expression?

Its been a long time since i watched TV, and watching the commercials, i am so sad to say, Singapore Ads Sucks. Will Zoe Tay stop chewing that damn chewing gum already? And someone stop buying that abalone for Fann Wong? And can i not see another one of those bursting firecrackers revealing words like BIG DEALS? Or another ad that says, the price of their item is now as cheap as making that ad u are watching right now.

Hello businessman? Get the ad sacarsm already and have some taste?

2006-01-19T16:09:00.000+08:00

Bonus or no bonus.....?

There was an email sent out regarding a office meeting on Tuesday. And since we’ve all been waiting for the news, we know the meeting’s about the bonus.

But I can’t help but imagine, that all of us could gather, and they would say, “ We are here to announce today, that, there would be no bonus for us this year, but as a token of appreciation, we’ve ordered some wines and buffet for you guys, eat well, and get back to work fast. Let’s work harder for bonus next year.”

*wakes up from nightmare, dripping with sweat.

2006-01-19T15:08:00.000+08:00

Kwodrent series 3.2005 preview on Friday 20 Jan
@ Asylum 22 ann siang road
From 1-9pm

this third series is an exciting project exploring decorative
components / objects inspired by nature. folding is used as a
generative process for the designs, giving new forms and meanings to the compositions.
-----------------------------------
Flea and Easy on Sunday 5 Feb
@ Zouk Jiak Kim Road
From 2-6pm

TO APPLY:
Application forms are available at the Zouk Reception from WED 18 JAN till SAT 21 JAN (from 11am-3am). It will be a balloting system. Results will be out on TUE 24 JAN. Only those who are selected will be informed to come down to Zouk to make $20 payment BY SAT 28 JAN (from 11am-3am). Those who fail to make their payment by the stated dates will be disqualified and their space will be given to the next applicant. Zouk only provide space for the public and they are required to bring their own mat and setup materials. Peace.
-----------------------------------
Sleep an installation exhibition by Derrick Lim
@ Wheelock place, epsite, #03-18.
now till 27 Jan

Derrick, first as a photographer to experiment with visual installation works. Take a look!
-----------------------------------
A Tropical Snow Ride, on this Saturday
@ Club Street

The bohemian enclave of Club Street will be transformed into icy slopes of white winter paradise this Chinese New Year 21 January (Saturday)! Catch exciting snowboarding demonstrations conducted by local and international professional snowboarders. This unique first-time ever tropical snowboarding display promises to thrill one and all!

Stores for rent by Club 95. Sell your old stuffs @ Club street.
-----------------------------------
Kiss is just a Kiss (Unless you do something about it)

Submit works of expressions in the form of drawings / poems / letters to Club 95, to express the feelings you've been too shy to show. Do something about it right now, instead of sitting and waiting. Submit your work at 95 Club Street.
-----------------------------------

2006-01-18T17:15:00.000+08:00

Flea and Easy! - Sun 05 Feb! Jan 16, '06 7:48 AM ET
for everyone
Flea and Easy! â€“ Zouk afternoon Flea Market and party
Sunday 5 Feb 2006 at Zouk and Wine Bar

No better way to spend a lazy afternoon then at Zoukâ€™s Flea and Easy, a social gathering for the whole family. Wine Bar is the haven for those tired of shopping and in need of an alcohol or caffeine fix.

Remember: Great bargains + alcohol +good tunes = Flea and Easy

Free admission

TO APPLY:
Application forms are available at the Zouk Reception from WED 18 JAN till SAT 21 JAN (from 11am-3am). It will be a balloting system. Results will be out on TUE 24 JAN. Only those who are selected will be informed to come down to Zouk to make $20 payment BY SAT 28 JAN (from 11am-3am). Those who fail to make their payment by the stated dates will be disqualified and their space will be given to the next applicant. Zouk only provide space for the public and they are required to bring their own mat and setup materials. Peace.

2006-01-18T15:10:00.000+08:00

Just back from a 2 day shoot. And a political stylist. And a bitchy stylist assistant. What I learned from this shoot?

Stylists should remember they were employed by us, and they are not CELEBRITY stylists.
Stylist assistants, who are just out as a novice, should TALK LESS. LEARN MORE. FUCK UR BITCHINESS. DO NOT STIR SHIT.
Stylists should remember not to be rude to neither client nor agency. Cause THEY ARE THE PEOPLE PAYING U. NOT THE STAR. (especially in the case of doing an ad)
Cut the act about being the ‘I-know-it-all’ ‘I-am-the-nice-one’, ‘I-am-the-best’ shit. Cause you will only end up being scrapped from our list forever.

Singapore’s such a small place, encompassing such a small industry, watch what you say, find out who decides, who pays, and talk less. Say one wrong thing, and be ready to be scrapped off the list forever. Client pays. Agency recommends.

Never bite the and that feeds you, or you will no longer be fed.

2006-01-18T14:58:00.000+08:00

Freaking good Honda Ad. One of those " why din i think of doing that ads".

2006-01-14T13:01:00.000+08:00

It's days like these, that you realise your dog and your friends are best friends.

2006-01-13T16:27:00.000+08:00

Bangkok Trip's been confirmed.
Away for trip from 27-31 January.
Whooopee*

2006-01-13T15:28:00.000+08:00

“My little dog------a heartbeat at my feet”
Edith Wharton

When people say “ my dog’s like a human”, I never quite knew what it all meant, till I met Rudie. I always felt refering to him as a dog felt wrong. He doesn’t seem to think he’s a dog himself. Tell him fetch, and he grabs the toy and looks at you, ‘what makes you think I would be so stupid to pass you the toy only to have you throw it out again?’. Bites the toy in his mouth, runs up to you, growls at you for thinking he’s stupid and runs away playing it in a corner far from you, giving you a suspicious look, of warning you he knows you would sneak up and snatch it away from him. Tell him ‘pawpaw’, and he looks away, almost showing you, ‘do you really think I am a blardy circus boy or what?’

So I’ve learnt over the years to speak to him like he was a child. When I say ‘go pee pee’. You would see his backview, as he strolls out of the front door out into the front yard, and takes the piss himself. Once done, he would come back into the house, pushes his head on your room door, to tell you he’s done.

He understands words like “ What have you done?” “ Did you anyhow pee?” , gives you a guilty look, and flees to hide under the bed or couch. Ask him whather he wants to go shopping by saying “ Do you want to go gai gai?” and you immediately see his eyes beam in delight, and stands up to paw you to hurry up. He even knows how to turn his back and sit next to you, raising one paw. Why? So that he is in the best position for you to lift him up to head out for a walk. (disclaimer: none of these were taught).

If he has to wait to go for his walk, or his food is too hot to eat, and he’s all scurrying around in excitement, you say “ boy, wait...” and he sits quietly trying to wait.

His best trick ever. Ask him “ Where is your jiji “(name of his favourite toy). And he immediately goes into a seeking mode, hunting for the toy through the entire house, and even checks where you are sitting, giving you the look of, “hey did you take my ball?”. It’s amazing.

Tell him something he doesn’t understand, and he tilts his head, looking at you, with a huge imaginary question mark on his head.

Sometimes J and I look at him and wonder how all these things are stored in his little head. After a hard day’s work, we look at him and say “ Kuai boy, go orh orh”. And you see him disappear into his little cage with soft towel, and lies down to sleep....

I have been blessed to have him. So here’s to Rudie, the little heartbeat at my feet.

2006-01-13T12:20:00.000+08:00

Still love her. Made her a Smoky Quartz and Black Agate necklace last night.

Smokey quartz is nature's stone of endurance. If you need a extra boost, carry a smokey quartz gemstone with you. It promotes:
• Personal pride and joy in living
• Creativity in business
• Opens the path for perception and learning

Healing properties of Smokey Quartz
Smokey Quartz is connected with the sounds of the universe. It makes you more aware of sounds including telepathic sounds. Smokey Quartz helps relieve depression.

Agate Gemstone meaning
This is THE stone everyone should have for protection. This group of stones are variegated chalcedony. (see also moss agate, eye agate) The agate is one of the oldest stones in recorded history.

Agates attract strength. Agate is a protection from bad dreams. It also protects from stress and energy drains.

Healing properties of agate
Agate is used for stomach upsets. Place the agate on the solar plexus. The agate can't change emotions, but helps to change our level of acceptance of the emotion. Such as when you are very sad the agate will let you know that this will pass and help you get on to another and better day. This is why the Agate is considered so powerful as it gives us the strength to carry on. Carry an agate when you have to make an important decision.

2006-01-13T11:20:00.000+08:00

Came to a realisation of a few things yesterday. I came to know that my forgetfulness as a person was pissing her off. I came to know that since her work always came before me, her tolerance for me would never reach average. I came to know that when she is fussing and stressed up about her work, I would be of zero importance to her at that particular point of time. From there I understood that it’s either I learn to live with it which means to numb myself against it. Or to tell her off each time it happens till she miraculously understands how much it affects me.

To me, loving a person has always been a package, there are some perfections, yet there would inevitably be some flaws. Over the years, I’ve come to accept myself, that being careless and forgetful’s one of my flaws, and that as much as it upsets me whenever I forget something, there has been nothing I could about it. And her picking on it yesterday did not make me feel any better about myself. I guess I’ve actually been lucky, each time I really forgot my things, my partners would always make sure for me, filing up my flaws, thus fitting into where I lack. When they know I always forget, they would always remind me. Or pick up the thing for me. Unfortunately, for the first time yesterday, not only was I hung up upon, I went home in the rain to get my wallet, and she did not even ask whether I managed to have lunch thereafter. Cos all that she had in her mind, was about her work, work stress, and that she hasn’t eaten, and why wasn’t I concern about her. Which I normally would, if she had not hung up my call on me, and never called back.

She made it seem like my forgetfulness was such a major problem, that she couldn’t handle, and that I should simply do something to seek help, or help myself about it. But there was nothing to handle. In fact I used to be worst.

If forgetfulness was a major problem that couldn’t be handled, I am afriad to find out what else would seem major to her. So I told myself nah, maybe the problem only looked big because she was all bogged down with her work stress, handling so many projects at the same time, which was then, I realised, it was also wrong to blame it on projects, to give herself the excuse to be impatient with me. I had been understanding her, helping her whenever I could, never scolding her when she’s late all the time, simply because that was my way of understanding. And yet once stressed, there I was, the perfect victim to scream at. I got even more pissed thinking about it. All the understanding probably made her feel, well I scream cause I am stressed, and she would understand what. Sorry, I can understand stress, I can understand helping you out, but I cannot tolerate understanding being screamed at. Or hung up on.

It would be nice, it had simply been, “ I am pretty stressed up right now, and can’t help pass you your stuffs, I would leave it at home, you pick it up okie? Sorry about that”. rather then “ I am angry with you forgetting your things. as if all the fault was mine.

2006-01-12T11:18:00.000+08:00

The weather’s been treacherous lately. Raindrops keeps falling from the skies. Unlike January of any of the years ahead, our weekends at home has never been gloomier. Our attempt to have a sunny weekend over at Bintan was a flop.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

We’ve gotten new members in the house! Meet Turbo, the pseudo hunk, who’s an extreme lone ranger, and meet Ginger, who’s the bitch of the bitch in the house. Staring at everyone who looks right in the tank. They are our new housemates, a pair of red slide ear terrapins.

Yesterday was my account’s producer’s last day. We headed down to Club 95 for her farewell, and in a mere hour, I downed 5 shots and one Long Island Tea, the mistake? Too fast a speed. And a not so pretty mix vodka, tequila, and everything else in the Long Island Tea was making my stomach churn. I got home drunk. Slept till 5am before I got up to bath, and get my hair washed up. My silly baby was waiting for me to wake up so she had a opened can of beer, and a half watched DVD on. How cute. So after that I slept for another about 4 hrs, before I came to work. And I woke up still with the feeling of alcohol reeking in my blood system. Not farnie.

Alcoholics being alcoholics, each time I get too pissed drunk, vomits, and feel miserable, I tell myself not to do the same again, yet each time I forget the last misery, and down my next till I remember the dejavu again.

2006-01-09T10:53:00.000+08:00

SLEEP with Derrick Lim
this Wednesday 11 January 2005, at 9pm,
Expsite, #03-18/19, Wheelock Place
in Sleepwear or loungewear.

(Invites only)

2006-01-05T14:03:00.000+08:00

I finally got down to charging my digital cam, and downloading the images from our xmas party at Whatcha. Here's just some snippets of it. Grin!

2006-01-05T12:38:00.000+08:00

My N70

Given by my dear J.

2006-01-04T18:50:00.000+08:00

1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
Generally good.

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
It was the moment, my feet touched the bottom of 7m in the sea of Bali, and holding my love’s hands, diving with her.

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
The night we gathered at Khaz Bar. The night I broke up. And broke down.

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
Can’t rem. Think it wasn’t too enjoyable. Probably arguing.

5) Who were you with?
My ex girlfriend.

6) Where were you when 2005 ends?
At Zouk counting down. Cos MOS was fucking packed.

7) Who were you with when 2005 ends?
Seven, Syl, Michael, Jean, Celia, Kim, and my love.

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005?
no. *hides away in total shame.

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?
All the same ones I did not keep in year 2005.

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
Definitely.

11) Did you break up with anyone in 2005?
yeah.

12) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
Yea, a new bunch of great friends!

13) Who are your favorite new friends?
Irene!

14) What was your favorite month of 2005?
May.

15) Did you travel outside Singapore in 2005?
Yes!

16) How many different countries did you travel to in 2005?
Malacca + Batu Pahat + Johor (haaaaaa) , Bali and HKG Twice.

17) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
Yeah. My ex.

18) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
Nope. I found all the people I missed, back.

19) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
Requiem of A Dream. (Watched the dvd at home)

20) What was your favorite song you heard in 2005?
It’s got to be ‘Lick my neck, my back, my pussy and my crack.....’

21) What was your favorite record from 2005?
Gwen Stefani’s latest Album

22) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
1.

23) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?
No.

24) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005?
Plenty. I lost count. Is my liver still there?

25) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
erh. Yeah. but minimal.

26) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
Nope. I lived it well.

27) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
That she really loves me, and that she would stop lying and she would change.
then she lied to her friends, flirt, begged for my forgiveness again.

28) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
Yes.

29) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
Yes. Very Badly.

30) How much money did you spend in 2005?
Oh. looks extremely guilty
Had spent the most money then any part of my life.

31) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
When I received my first Credit Card.

32) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
Not scream at my love from an argument.

33) What are your plans for 2006?
Find my career path. Study communication / marketing. Do a creative course in london. Move into our new house.

2006-01-04T17:52:00.000+08:00

The Fishes : Pisces
Febuary 20 to March 20

Traditional Pisces Traits
Imaginative and sensitive
Compassionate and kind
Selfless and unworldly
Intuitive and sympathetic

On the dark side....

Escapist and idealistic
Secretive and vague
Weak-willed and easily led

Pisces
Pisceans possess a gentle, patient, malleable nature. They have many generous qualities and are friendly, good natured, kind and compassionate, sensitive to the feelings of those around them, and respond with the utmost sympathy and tact to any suffering they encounter. They are deservedly popular with all kinds of people, partly because their easygoing, affectionate, submissive natures offer no threat or challenge to stronger and more exuberant characters. They accept the people around them and the circumstances in which they find themselves rather than trying to adapt them to suit themselves, and they patiently wait for problems to sort themselves out rather than take the initiative in solving them. They are more readily concerned with the problems of others than with their own.

Their natures tend to be too otherworldly for the practical purposes of living in this world as it is. They sometimes exist emotionally rather than rationally, instinctively more than intellectually (depending on how they are aspected). They long to be recognized as greatly creative. They also dislike disciple and confinement. The nine-to-five life is not for them. Any rebellion they make against convention is personal, however, as they often times do not have the energy or motivation to battle against the Establishment.

Pisceans tend to withdraw into a dream world where their qualities can bring mental satisfaction and sometimes, fame and financial reward for they are extremely gifted artistically. They are also versatile and intuitive, have quick understanding, observe and listen well, and are receptive to new ideas and atmospheres. All these factors can combine to produce remarkable creativity in literature, music and art. They may count among their gifts mediumistic qualities which can give them a feeling that their best work comes from outside themselves, "Whispered beyond the misted curtains, screening this world from that." Even when they cannot express themselves creatively they have a greater than average instinct for, and love of, beauty in art and nature, a catlike appreciation of luxury and pleasure, and a yearning for new sensations and travel to remote, exotic places.

They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected. They are nevertheless intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful.

In their employment they are better working either by themselves or in subordinate positions. Their talents are individual in a commercial business or similar undertaking. They would be afraid to manage more than a small department, worrying always that they would fail in a crisis. They can make fair secretaries and bookkeepers. Their sympathy equips them for work in charities catering for the needy, as nurses looking after the sick and as veterinary surgeons caring for animals. As librarians or astronomers they can satisfy their mental wanderlust, and their fondness for "faraway places with strange-sounding names" may turn them into sailors or travellers. Many architects and lawyers are Pisceans, and when the creative abilities are combined with gifts of imitation and the ability to enter into the feelings of others, Pisceans find their fulfillment on the stage. Their psychic and spiritual qualities can lead them into careers in the church or as mediums and mystics. They may find an outlet for their creativity as caterers, and are said to make good detectives because they can imagine themselves in the place of criminals and understand how their minds would work. In technical occupations they are well employed in dealing with anaesthetics, fluids, gases and plastics. Because of their lively versatility and inability to concentrate overmuch on any one project, Pisceans often simultaneously follow more than one occupation.

Possible Health Concerns...
Pisces governs the feet, liver and lymphatics, and its subjects can be threatened by anaemia, boils, ulcers and other skin diseases, especially inflammation of the eyelids, gout, inflammation, heavy periods and foot disorders and lameness.

LIKES
Solitude to dream in
Mystery in all its guises
Anything discarded to stay discarded
The ridiculous
like to get 'lost'
DISLIKES
the obvious
being criticized
feeling all at sea about something
know-it-alls
pedantry

PROBLEMS THAT MAY ARISE FOR YOU, AND THEIR SOLUTIONS

As with all sun signs, we all have unique traits to our personalities. When these traits are suppressed, or unrealized, problems will arise. However, with astrology we can examine the problem and assess the proper solution based on the sun sign characteristics. As a pisces you may see things below that really strike home. Try the solution, you most likely will be amazed at the results. If you find yourself on the receiving end of the negatives below, it is because you are failing to express the positive.

Problem: You find yourself being walked on or over in all manner of ways.
Solution: Try to reorient your thinking and assert yourself in a quiet, reserved manner that is more impressive than blustering.

Problem: Never seeming to have enough money to round out the week with much less the month even though your salary is on a par with everyone else'.
Solution: You are prone to act as if you have more than you actually do and tend to spend that which you do not have or need for other things. Forego some of the parties and make a strict budget to put yourself on.
Problem: A strong sense of despair not shared by family and friends, thus leaving you with that all alone feeling.

Solution: You must come out of yourself and open up to those around you, you have the power to inspire others making you an important part of the human race; take your rightful place.
Problem: Causing others to be quarrelsome or to walk out on you all together.

Solution: The upstream fish may be pushing too hard for someone to meet your ideals and could wind up pushing people right out of your life. Try lightning up.

The animal associated with your sign is the fish,(actually two fish swimming in different directions). Fish have long been a food staple and it is also associated with Christianity as a symbol, the two fishes swimming in opposite directions points up the inner tensions of the sign of pisces.

The color of choice for Pisces is Soft Seagreen

Your starstone is the precious Moonstone. They are not brilliant stones, in fact, all of the specimens, from the peach and grays to the gem-quality blue and rainbow-colored pieces, are soft and translucent. The physical appearance of a stone often suggests its spiritual qualities, and moonstone's most important attribute is the ability to assist us in calming and soothing the emotions. When one has achieved a state of emotional calmness, this stone may be used to open a path to an intuitive understanding of spirituality.

so me.

2006-01-04T17:41:00.000+08:00

MY DARLINGS

Them chilling out on the leather bench together. Muah!

2006-01-04T12:24:00.000+08:00

Weird phenomenons of Advertising.

1. Zil understanding of the existence of Advertising in Business
People used to mutter names of gurus of advertising under their breath. Commoners knew the names of Neil French, and David Ogilvy. And those were the golden years where creatives were gold mines. The job was considered as glamourous as being a celebrity. Today, if your client was to be willing to pay for creative input time, we would have to head down to the nearest NTUC to buy a lottery ticket for ourselves. Advertising has become a space to list as much promotions, product specifications, store details as possible. If not a HUGE product image filling up the edges of the ad, so that the sales manager could get bountiful sales, earn his huge commision / bonus for the year, and maybe even a promotion.

2. Zil knowledge of Advertising as a job among commoners
When people ask what my job is, and I answer, Art Director. The ultimate reaction is a raised eyebrow. And there are only 2 things that may go on in their head.

Wow! Director sounds good. Does she have shares and get paid highly?
What the fuck does an art director do? Aint art all bullshit? Nevermind jus pretend to look impressed.

And sadly to say that’s even the reaction I get, when I sit over dinner table with a group of educated architects from NUS. Who goes on about them as designers in in the industry. Creative people. Yet the moment I answer them, all I saw were blank faces, with no idea what my job scope is. And I got to the point where , I myself could no longer be bothered to explain. I think everyone knows the term Graphic Designer better. And assume that’s advertising.

And these people are our target group, people who we are communicating with everyday. And they had no idea that there are thousands of people slogging behind all those work they see in magazines, newspapers and television. The larger the communication. The less they seem to understand. The more they take for granted?

3. Sales/Operations team has figured a way to skive.
Sales, already one of the easiest job in the world to be in, being people who has the mouth to talk, the brains to know whats the easiest way to earn money, and they’ve actually figured a way to laze even more. They’ve realised that they can blame sales figure on the advertising agency. No sales? Points* right straight to the agency complaining to the A&P department that the numbers to call were not HUGE enough when they were already point size 15! Or they simply say the ads were not good enough thus nobody’s calling. What has schools been teaching sales and marketing people? Is being non- initiative on sales floor their new teaching?

4. The word ‘Creative’ becomes a taboo. It equates, something new without budget. Go Perform some magic.
In a briefing this morning, the common complains of the ad being too boring, not attracting enough sales were said again. The specifications for the new ‘CREATIVE’ ad? Junior size. Black and White. Creative Photoshoot, with Zil budget. I’ve never received a better brief then that, to make a sales difference. Advertising school never taught us that advertising could do miracles!

Either marketing people nowadays are becoming a little brainless, or that they forgot that nothing can happen without paying any money. Ideas are empty talk, if you don’t even have a budget.

5. Marketing = Giving a brief to Agency to do all the selling planning.
Working with marketing people on freelance basis or in the company has really gotten on my nerves. They are the people who are supposed to be giving you their business / marketing plans, fully researched and thought out for the year, and as an agency, we would be the people who can then understand their plans, and visualise it for them. But all that seemed to be lost, they on longer do their planning, they spend their time, doing a brief to the agency and leaving it up to the agency to do all the work for them. Questions like how do you want to launch your product are no longer answered, but just a one pager, one idea, powerpoint slide for our reading. I get a brief from the marketing director to develop a website, and I ask, What is the USP of your organisation, who are your competitors and how do you want to position yourself, and nothing could be answered. throws hands in the air. SO. What the hell do I know what I need to visualise and communicate for you then? OR should I write the marketing brief for you?

-What is the world coming to?

2006-01-03T11:36:00.000+08:00

Morning girls! I am back at work! Fresh from close to 2 weeks of rest. Whoopee! I was really resting, didn’t get much done at all, apart from my freelance work with the Club. Days seems to really pass me by, managed to start on a quarter of a book on Emotional Inteligence. Never understood how difficult it is to keep sane by reading when working hur? It’s almost close to impossible to read. Absolute zil time.

So I spent my New Year with Miss J, and her gf C, cause it was her birthday. Before we headed down to Zouk for countdown, cos the initial thought of heading down to MOS was scrapped the moment we drove past, and saw the queue all the way to the Bungee Shot ride. No way were we gonna countdown in the midst of the queue on the roads of singapore. No way! So it was Danny Tengalia spinning over at Zouk, and costed us a bomb of 38 bucks to get in. Fucking expensive. Anyways, we had fun, getting drunk and counting down. I love counting down with friends, the mere moment of stopping to look around you, as you countdown and look at the people who are with you, and you tell yourself, wow, these are my friends, hug them from the bottom of your heart, and the feeling’s overwhelming. Thank god for my friends, my dearest J, and J’s friends for the year of 2005. 2005 wasn’t that bad at all.

Close to 2 years, of not talking to Miss S, my dearest friend, and this year, I spent xmas, new year, and her birthday with her. 6 years of friendship, amazingly bad times shared. Friends, it’s a term for people who have been there and seen it all with you, yet still stay with you throughout, never once demeaning you. For that Miss S is a dear friend. I kissed her forehead and wished her happiness for the year of 2006.

And to my dearest heart, J, you have been the best thing that happened to me in 2005. I am so glad we found each other. I’ve learnt a lot from you. I’ve learnt to see perspective I never saw before, I’ve learnt to treasure more then I ever thought I could. You are a gem.

So we got so drunk, we dragged J and C home, where our housemates were having steamboat, and we went up to bath and get changed and while we were at that, drunk miss J was dragged out of the house by miss C, cause she called a cab. And miss C ignorant to what shoe miss J wears, grabbed my darling’s latest leather Adidas shoe into a cab, decided she needed a pee, and went upstairs to pee. The cab driver got impatient and drove off with the pair of shoes. Housemates screamed to alarm us of missing shoe, when they realised miss J’s shoes were still in the house. They thought the shoes were mine, and all their face went pale, knowing I would be sooooooooo unhappy if I was to find out my shoes are missing, only to find out later from the whispers that it was a adidas shoe, then my darling realised it was hers. Now HER face went pale. She kept quiet, but I could tell she was pretty upset. Called the cab company, screamed at the operator, and a moment later, miss J called to screamed at the company too, and she said the driver claimed to have returned the shoes in a paper bag outside our gate. I checked. None. Then. Viola. There it was strewn next to my dar’s car. Right. The leather was scratched, but the shoes are back. Phew. What drama on new year’s day.

But it was pretty farnie, now that we thought back on it.

2005-12-30T13:43:00.000+08:00

From Miss Jap to Miss Taiwan

Pic one : Before i cut my hair. My braids from the back.
Pic two : After i removed my braids, scary....*
Pic three: After i straightened my hair. Miss Taiwan.

Hairdresser: Kate of Blitz @ Holland V. She's good!

A general survey showed that they think the scary spice hair suits me, so... am gonna keep that hairstyle in mind. Was worried that when i sleep, my PONG hair would go into my baby's face. Chuckles.

2005-12-29T12:22:00.000+08:00

Who said advertising is glamorous?

Things that break the mundane code of life, are the little things in life called, bonus, and promotions. These are the factors that keep people working hard through the year. And are the factors that keeps people to slave for you. Yet strangely, many companies seem to forget what these benefits are for, and its beginning to make me wonder, what the management people has been studying regarding managing people’s expections, and returns.

It’s been 2 years in my current company, and 2 years is normally judgement time for me. I don’t enjoy job hopping, and two years is a very comfortable stage to be in, being able to handle jobs, knowing every notch of it, close one eyes, and get the simple jobs done, since one’s already been doing it for coming 2 years. But at the same time, 2 years has passed, and there has been none appreciation from the company. And 2 years is enough time for me to learn, and want to be given bigger better responsibilties or to learn more. 2 years is also a good to know, whether I am really worth more.

A year passed, and when it was appraisal time, my CD left. And I worked hard for another year, maturing in my work, hoping for the best, and when it’s appraisal time again, my second CD left. Who is ever going to know and understand the work I had been doing for the past 2 years?

Being 25 turning 26, felt like when I was 20 turning 21. I felt lost all over again, wanting to take in more, yet not really understanding what I should be taking in. Everything seems a little blur, and I feel like I am just flowing along. I am afriad of feeling lost, I like to know what I can be doing, or what I would want to do. Yet time and time again, my dreams seems to be turning fader.

Should I continue to my master studies?
If I was to continue, what should I study?
Is advertising the road for me, even after 30?
Would selling the art, be paid more then doing the art?

4 years of working, I had moved from Multimedia, Interactive design to advertising. I’ve transported myself from one arena to another, to see more future, and yet future still feels a little bleak. I’ve been happy doing what I’ve been doing, yet I don’t feel forever from it....

Such industry just seemed so shortlived.

A tiler who manages 3 teams and does minor tiling earns least 6k, at age 27. Pharmaceutical Sales, brings in about 6k with commission from sales. Why is it that our industry never has a job that can let us earn that much, with the expertise we have? I don’t know about you guys, but how do you feel when you realise how unappreciated and unpaid your trade is?

And no amount of Citrine gems could help get me richer in this sad, slavery industry.

2005-12-28T17:57:00.000+08:00

Having a nice tan at KM8 the morning after fattening christmas season. We tucked in our bellies, and headed out for the sun, hoping to catch a nice tan, and head back to work, where colleagues would think i had a wow weekend, and be too afraid to asked what i had been doing over the weekend. chuckles. Nah we were just hoping the tan would make us look thinner, and hide the christmas fats.

But i actually ended up waking up with a pain in my eye, and the morning in the sun, made it worst, after the tanning session, we headed back home with our friends to catch some dvd and eat some durians, after i visited the doctor only to be given 2 days mc to rest my poor eyes. *yippee*. silent cheer* And i would only be back at work on thursday with a half day leave! Chuckles.....

So i ended up wearing specs at home to work. And here's nasty proof of it. Yeah i was working on my laptop, got bored, whipped out my handphone, and started snapping pictures of myself. Ignore the mess behind me, it's only gonna be temporarily till our new house gets done up in feb. Chuckles.

2005-12-28T17:39:00.000+08:00

You are the Temperance card. Temperance is the
blending of elements to produce stability. We
say that someone is temperate when they are
pleasant and easy going. Temperance achieves
balance through merging, so a temperate person
is one who feels whole. Creative genius is
often found in the ability to unite two
previously unconnected ideas. Aleister Crowley
considers this one of the most important facets
of this card and names the card Art. He refers
to a generation of a third element out of two
previously existing elements. In the same way,
the artist has the ability to create a painting
from canvas and some tubes of coloured paint.
The temperate person is also inclined to think
about philosophy. Temperance leads to a calm
and rational logic but can also look beyond
everyday knowledge for the truth. Image from
The Stone Tarot deck.
http://hometown.aol.com/newtarotdeck/

Which Tarot Card Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2005-12-28T17:03:00.000+08:00

Miss J, Miss K, and Miss S.

Christmas Lunch @ Miss I's house

Yeah experimenting the fact that we should lean back when taking pictures with very skinny tiny weeny people. They make our face bigger. It was a great lunch over at Miss i's place. We ate till we could fast for 3 mths str8. There was neverending supply of food, and a major factory was created to wrap presents which everyone brought over to donate to the Marymount Convent girls.

What's more to christmas then to do some sharing?

Dinner at my place went well too. We cooked, and nothing failed. I made my Marinara pasta, and Cheese with Tomato mussel. While Miss M made soup and Pita, and Miss C helped out with the slicing and the cutting and the poking of ham and hotdogs onto sticks. The pita was marvelous. With all that preparation, and all that fuss, christmas was off and and away in a wink of an eye. And another year seems to be passing us by....

Oh DID I FORGET TO MENTION? I RECEIVED A N70 AS MY CHRISTMAS PRESENT THIS YEAR FROM HEART!
Smiles.

2005-12-28T12:33:00.000+08:00

Pictures from her farewell party on the 23rd of Dec @ her house.

Bon Voyage to our dear friend, Miss Y

Who packs her bag and her life to move over to Shanghai to be with her love. Wishing her all the best in her new job, and Miss y, we will go Shanghai to look for you. Take care now.

2005-12-22T18:24:00.000+08:00

Saw this darling on sale on a car website locally. Aint she beautiful?
------------------------------------------------------------------
Jeep Wrangler Sports Edition
Price $79,000
Transmission Auto
Engine Capacity 3960 cc
Registration Date 11-Dec-2003
Mileage 23,000 km
Features Airbag (Driver), Airbag (Passenger), ABS
Accessories Sports Rim, Leather Seats, CD-Changer
Description Sporty and adventurous car. Stock canvas. Various add-ons.
COE $24,112
OMV $24,142
Depreciation $7,914 per year
No. of owners 1
Type of Vehicle SUV
------------------------------------------------------------------
just aint she beautiful.....

2005-12-22T17:26:00.000+08:00

Recap of year 2006.

Places travelled to.
1. HongKong
2. Taiwan (Cancelled)
3. HongKong (again)
4. Bali
5. Malacca

Happenings this year
1. Managed an entire campaign and photoshoot with celebrity.
2. Dived in Bali
3. Drove in Malacca
4. Drove Bike in Bali
5. Got my Credit Card and Supp card
6. Fell out of love
7. Fell in love
8. To be able to manage freelancing with Full time job
9. Continue communicating with my old friends again
10. Moved out to stay on my own, away from parents
11. Learnt how to cook proper meals

2005-12-22T16:13:00.000+08:00

Isn't it christmas yet?

Working today, brings nil in production rate. Everyone’s already in a festive mood. Not really working. Simply waiting for the hours to pass. Giving out presents and sweets. I bought a little M&M machine with christmas mint M&Ms to give out to th e office, where each of them are made to turn this little knob at the top to see the chocolate slide down for them to collect.

I love christmas. Christmas always makes me feel loved and wanting to love. The only think I don’t like about christmas is that it makes one feel poor. (chuckles). Miss P gave me a nice “ Pink & Proud” painting she did herself for me. She’s really quite good at artworks I must say.

2 more hours to the end of work today, and tomorrow our office would be closed. Then I would need to meet my depressive ex-housemate for some christmas shopping, and getting ready for our House party.

Our friend’s also having a lunch party where we all have to get gifts not for her, but for kids of 6-14 for marymount covent. Which was a really cool idea. Gonna wrap the gifts up and leave it at their gate as a surprise for them.

Merry Christmas to my heart. Gave her a Georg Jenson ring for christmas. She’s been wonderful.....smiles* Bliss.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Bring Your Favourite Toy Party!

2005-12-21T16:20:00.000+08:00

bunny
Originally uploaded by submind.

You are invited!

2005-12-21T12:45:00.000+08:00

DO YOU LOVE, LOVE?

Yes i Love, love.

2005-12-21T12:04:00.000+08:00

NEW IMAGES! on Rudie and Friends set.

2005-12-20T10:59:00.000+08:00

BRING YOUR FAVOURITE TOY THIS CHRISTMAS

Don’t want to squeeze with the crowds at zouk or MOS to party? Don’t want to be queueing in endless lines for expensive meals restaurants? Don’t know where to go to celebrate christmas?

Come to “Bring Your Favourite Toy this Christmas” party @ our house. What is your favourite toy? It could range from being your snugly fugly soft, bedside mate, to your toy car, transformers, to your private little sex toys! Bring something nobody else has as their toy. Name it, and each and everyone of you would be taking a mug shot with your toy, to form a mural later.

Also, it’s a pot luck and cook-in session. Bring your own already made food, or cook in our kitchen. Not able to cook? Feeling guilty about it? Bring wine, chips, snacks, drinks, and plenty of alcohol!

Party starts from 7pm till late on the Christmas Eve. Email me to RSVP!

Cheers,
Ron

2005-12-19T17:12:00.000+08:00

Roadtrip to Malacca

This 1 month alone, i've rode a motorbike on Bali Roads. I've dived in Bali waters, I also drove on the Malaysia highways at 120km/h on way of Malacca to Batu Pahat. I am so happy. It's been such a long time, that I had been able to challenge my innder self like that. Been away from anything extreme has made me less courageous in some ways. I used to have forgotten what being scared was, and when i refrained from the challenges, and the first thing i did was to dive, i really got a little scared, and was surprised at myself. But recently, i kinda found my courage back. Am able to take challenges on, without much fear again. That makes me happy.

It was okie that we gave MOS a miss from the overwhelming crowd, and went on to hire a Toyota Corolla to head up to Malacca for the weekend. We had decided to do a group drive up, with S's family. S took the lead flying her manual nissan up to 140km/h on their expressway. Both the mazda and us, were trying with all our might to catch up with her. It was a challenging drive, consisting of roads as wide as only our car, and the wheels are always just a cm away from the large ditches on the left side of the road, while oncoming traffic tries to pass you by with just a large an area on a road, long and dark, without road lamps at all.

And when we thought Malacca had nothing for us to buy, we ended up spending just as much money as we would if we were to go to Bangkok. Apart from the air tickets, since we stayed overnight for one night at Renassiance Hotel. Nice hotel, great breakfast. Recommended. It was really the FOS at Makolta that made J go mad. She bought quite alot of nice shirts from there for work. I bought only 3 things from there, including a paint sprayed Abercombie & Fitch denim skirt, a A&F top, and a sundress like top. Oh, and a funky green Abercombie slipper!

Food there is crazily cheap. 5 dishes including an Asam Fish, and 2 crabs costs each of us only 6 sing! Crazy! The food was so sinful, yet so delicious, we just couldn't stop even when we started to look like we were 4 mths pregnant. Thank god we don't live there. They even had supper, which was LOK LOK, J and I skipped it, since i was coming down with a flu, so we stayed in the hotel.

Nope we didn't take any pictures, cause I was more into enjoying the experience, then wanting to take pictures. heh. Sorry guys. We took the second link back, jammed for a blardy 2 and a half hours, reached singapore at close to 1am at night, and now we are all a little stoned.

It was fun though. Would be happy to do it again. It was a pity we couldn't do another one and a half hr drive up to KL in the night to meet C and W. We were too beaten. Sorry gals! Next time!

2005-12-19T16:15:00.000+08:00

Photo Albums released

Publicis Idol 2005 @ Bar None

People whom i never knew had all that party zest in them were all caught on camera, that day. It was a crazy party. One of the best office parties we've all been to.

Bali Trip November 2005

Bali Trip with heart.

2005-12-16T18:08:00.000+08:00

Sinking Titanic

I was at Club95 after my company dinner, and being the bitchy self arising from a little too much to drink, I bitchily asked a girl who’s working in a respectable local agency, whether she’s intending to look for a new job soon. And she looked at me like why. So I went on to explain, “ well, there’s been rumours aint it that you company’s offering shares out, to be bought over by larger agencies.”

she curtly replied “ yes there’s rumours going around, and no it’s not going to happen. my account’s safe, and nothing’s going to change.” So I continued with my bitchiness to say “yes I know ur account’s staying, but your company’s been losing a lot of accounts, and it’s beginning to look lop-sided.” “think you should start looking for greener pastures soon?” and she replied with such assurance, “ even if I was to move out of my agency, it would be because it’s time for me to move in order to grow, not because of the situation.” so she asked me back “ aint you thinking of moving?”. I answered “ no, not yet.”........

Right. The conversation ended, I found it pointless to go on. Then somehow I can’t remember why the conversation came back, and she went on to say “ sorry to say this, I am very frank, but I think in your company the suits have a easy life. cause it’s the account servicing that rules.” (maybe she wasn’t gonna let me off from being bitchy in part 1 of the night.) I replied” yes you are right, but they are normally just messengers. They pass the message, and sometimes even get the messages wrong.” Only to get a fellow friend, throw an opinion in the air “well, it’s always better to get messengers then people who adds comments and opinions in.” I nodded, agreeing to it.

ever seen a person hanging hard to the buoy believing that his titanic’s not sinking?

2005-12-16T15:32:00.000+08:00

Simple and darn farnie dandruff ad.

2005-12-16T15:14:00.000+08:00

Nokia World Wide Wish
To the people who designed this website. Hello. We've done this concept before and won an award for it, two years ago. Be more creative then this please.

2005-12-15T17:45:00.000+08:00

FreeLOADERS
We are always told when we have money, we can get anything we want. We always defy agreeing with that, yet I’ve come to know that with money, not only can we get what we want, we can also know someone’s character. It buys you the understanding of another person.

It is only through the usage of money that one can see the more disgusting and evil side of a human. Recently, there’s just been too many people whom I’ve come to know, that from their daily impression of being all generous and charismatic, they can be the very people who can, suddenly adorn skin as thick as an elephant’s hide, and not even feel the least bit embarassed nor ashamed of the fact that they owe you money and in fact still swing around in front of you with all the pride they have.

It’s disgusting.

They are also the very same people who would think luxury and money comes granted for them, and that them having it, is just a part and parcel of life. At the same time, when they are low on cash flows, they think it’s only people’s fault and that everyone else should understand and sympathise their situation and actually have to hold their owe of money to you, for as long as you can, draining you dry of your funds.

These are the people who from the beginning of time, were not worth knowing.

They really should dig their conscience, and think about what harm they are doing out off their own selfishness, and still thinking that people owes it to them. Hello to these people, if you guys stop bragging nobody will blame you so much if you say “ yes I am poor. I am sorry”. Don’t go on about your riches, then ask for extension of timeline again agin and again, saying you don’t have a penny to pay. Hell.

What goes round comes round ladies.

2005-12-13T19:27:00.000+08:00

Bali Trip

I’ve been back from Bali for about a week now, and the memories of Bali still stays deeply etched in my mind, and which I figured would stay for a long time more. We were glad we went. It was a trip where we managed to have the best things, cheaper then expected. The trip begun with a cheap promotional air ticket of 168 bucks by SQ. Providing us the luxury to catch Queer Eye for a Straight Guy, through Kris World on our 2 and a half hours flight.

First night was not that fantastic over at a hotel recommended by a friend, called Puri Naga, which was situated near to Double Six, a famous druggie clubbing place. The hotel was old, and traditional. The furniture smelt of old wood, and the tiles on the floor was too outdated. It felt like Hotel 81, 10 years ago. It was liveable indeed, but ... I was there for a holiday... sulks.
The next day we headed down to Kuta Beach, and we took a look at Hard Rock Café, which was where J has stayed on her last trip to Bali. It was resort styled with themed rooms. The pool was simply fantastic, complete with sand. The rooms were alright. 190 USD per night, was a bomb, but that was when I realised, damn, why are we staying at Puri Naga.

Luckily when I was tying my hair at Kuta Beach, a local boy came to know us, and subsequently recommended a great place for us to stay. It was Bali Mulia Villa, situated near Simanyak, at only 55USD per night. Heh. I was then a happy girl.

It was a private villa, with a open kitchen and living space concept, and our very own pool and jacuzzi. The bath included a bathtub, and a open sky rain shower with pebbles. It was beautiful. I was swooned. We did also check out another place, called the Drupali Studio Apartments, at Drupali, it was nice and contemporary, but Mulia won us over. I sWe packed from Puri Naga, and immediately moved over. The local boy, Andi, was such a great help.

And throughout the trip he drove us around in his jeep, even up to Ubud. Introduced clubs to us, and brought us around for food. We went to M Bar Go, Bounty and Double Six to club. Each of us drove a bike to explore the town, on the first day, from Puri Naga to Kuta and back by ourselves, and we went for a 7m Scuba Dive, where I learned how to dive, touched corals, and played with the fishes. It was an amazing trip.

2005-12-13T19:11:00.000+08:00

I made a beautiful turquoise nugget necklace for my friend, S, for her birthday. Since it was her birthstone. She was delighted. And made matching more manly ones for S too.

2005-12-13T14:41:00.000+08:00

You know you have matured when someone tells you they feel hurt over love, and you’ve been there done that, pats her back and says, life’s like that. You know you have matured when your colleague breaks down at work, and cries, and you know how it felt like, and pats her and says work’s like that, and offers her solutions calmly. You know you have matured, when someone tells you how infidelity by her gf has hurt her, you smile and you say. Yeah. Relationship’s like that. It really doesn’t matter so much anymore.

I have matured. have you?

Today’s one of those days, where I realised I am overwhelmed by my knowledge about things, my ability to see through actions, and characters, and their negative energy starts eating me up. I feel exhausted by the knowledge and I actually start to feel suffocated. It is times like these, where I wished I was more ignorant of situations, and not be able to understand fully what is going on in the real world. The ugly side of men, the ugly perspective of life.

Ignorance is bliss, I want to be ignorant.

One of our friend’s jobless, and she’s looking for a job, making her feel a little depressed. And I actually said to her, you know, this is when you learn that sitting in a shit job is sometimes better then being jobless. And there’s where you lear never to quit on impulse, and that job feeds the rest of the percentage of your life. And seriously when you are out of it, you will learn to realise, the shitty job wasn’t so shitty afterall. Cause,even in the process of you moving on hoping for greener pastures, you would meet someone else who is just as bad in other ways, or worst. I guess that’s just one of god’s way of teaching us to appreciate what little we have.

Thank god for my shitty job.

I was also at the same time realising that there are two parts of a human character. We are all evil and scheming by nature, and its just how much intelligence for you to start realising what steps and what shortcuts in life bring you the best achievements. But at the same time, there’s also the part where you admit to your evil side, and let your good side, the side with morals and principles help you decide whether or not the final decision should be carried out. And in the process of carrying out, would it hurt anyone, would it be trampling on someone’s life, would be be wrong morally. The deciding point’s a little grey. Sigh.

One has to constantly remind themselves to avoid cheating people. I hate being cheated on. I wouldn’t want to do the same to people.

2005-12-12T12:36:00.000+08:00

Party @ Thumper

See no Evil. Say no Evil. Do no Evil.

2005-12-02T21:26:00.000+08:00

WE ARE BACK FROM BALI!

2005-11-25T10:22:00.000+08:00

It’s weird how when I was in the pantry this morning, making my usual brew of coffee, my colleague looks at me and asked, are you attached again? You look extremely well dressed everyday. I was amused, and asked back, why do I have to be attached to be dressy? Isn’t it that when one’s single one would dress up in hope for a date? So she replied, no... but you had been looking like you had been taking the effort to dress up almost everyday. (hahah... the real reason is just that I enjoy matching things up. Never quite knew I look dressy everyday). Chuckles.

2005-11-24T15:27:00.000+08:00

原來愛情的世界很大, 大的可以裝下一百中為屈,
原來愛情的世界很小，小到三個人就擠到窒息。
原來愛情的世界很大，塞了多少幸福還是有空虛。
原來愛情的世界很小，被一腳踩過就變成廢墟。
-EASON CHAN

The world of love is so large, it can accomodate thousands of compromise.
The world of love is so small, three becomes a crowd, feeling suffocating.
The world of love is so large, when you yearn for happiness, all you get is emptiness.
The world of love is so small, once you trample on it, it's diminishes like nothing.

2005-11-24T11:56:00.000+08:00

When I think of Bali, I think of, nice hot shorts, plenty of surf wear, bikinis, diving, rafting, riding a bike without license, pleated hair, nice blue skies, smell of the sea in the wind, ruins from the past bombings, large american diners, a line of small shops selling funky necklaces, sun, sun and more sun.

2005-11-24T11:53:00.000+08:00

One more day to Bali Trip

One more day to my trip in Bali. I can’t wait for this hiatus from work. Work’s been extremely overwhelming. Been trying to do too much with too little time. That’s me for being too work’oholic sometimes. Really feel like doing some crazy shopping for the upcoming christmas season, but nah... gotta control the pocket a little. Sheez sheepish look.

Looking at all those beautiful clothes online, as I am prefering my next photoshoot, I can’t but drool, and wonder when I would be able to close my eyes, and swipe all those clothes off the shelves into my wardrobe. Oh. Sulks.

Alright, so it’s the season of giving soon, and it’s time to give again. Fuck! Yet planned anything for the celebration of christmas! Anyways back to where I was saying, here’s a wishlist to help solve your troubles of buying anything for me, if you intending to! haha

I would love anything that ranges from
1. Retro home furninshings
2. Beaded Necklaces
3. Anything from FleaCircus at Anthropology
4. Nice tops from Zara / Mango / FCUK / Miss Sixty
5. A Pair of slurpish Miss Sixty jeans (I know I have wished this for yrs!)
6. Accessories for my Nano (NoirMystique)
7. Funky, or slinky accessories
8. Acccesories from Guess
9. Earrings from Frufru and Tigerlily
10. Anything from Tiffany (Har!)
11. CDs or books from Asylum
12. Music CDS from HMV’s Dance section
13. Clothes from the new Fashion nike range
14. Adidas Cap
15. Voucher for Tattoo/piercing
16. A new tongue stud
17. Bikinis from Flash and Splash
18. Hair voucher from Blitz
19. Air ticket to Bangkok
20. Nice funky button badges

Heheh...!
(Alright you can tell me your list too)

2005-11-21T18:51:00.000+08:00

Got this from Styra's .Choose Yr Own Adventure Murder Mystery.

Homophobia and You:

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Repost this if you realize homophobia is wrong.

2005-11-21T18:46:00.000+08:00

WOHA designs next project : Singapore Arts School

I was at the National Library yesterday to check out the exhibition on the Architectural Design for the latest addition of schools in Singapore, the Singapore Arts School. When I first heard about it, I was pissed and angry and felt like I was not borned at the right era, which would most help push my potential. Had always wanted to be in a school which would teach in-depth knowledge of arts and designs from the age of 13. It would give us enough time to be fully knowledgeable of such an intensive field and industry by 20.

I was definitely impressed by WOHA being the chosen architectural firm for this next project. And their proposal was one that definitely looks sound. The other participating companies were Architect61, Forum Architects, DP Architects, and W Architects. WOHA as always had the intrinsic detailing and care, for the environment inside, and the environment around. They tend to be able to design in various perspectives, and build a layered story around it. Their building never tries to outshine others, but more of blending it with a more cutting edge detailing. Understated style. Go take a look.

Apart from that, I learnt that the curriculums of the school based on the plans drawn up of the facilities, provided only for a syllabus that consisted of Visual, Music and Performance Arts (drama and dance). The kids from 13 – 18 would be studying all the normal curriculums of Literature, science, math, english etc, then with added programmes like arts were included.

As a design and arts student for years myself, I was angrier to realise, that the plan of the Singapore Arts School was purely a money making business. Called an Arts School, notice how it stays away from the word design. Strangely located along the same street as to LASALLE and NAFA, and offering almost similar subjects, except for the fact that the kids get to do it earlier by age. When will they realise that Singapore NEEDS badly a ARTS and DESIGN school that offers courses ranging from
Fashion Design
Visual Communication
Advertising (Creative)
Advertising and promotions
Product / Industrial Design
Architectural Design
Video and Film School
Drama and Arts
Dance and Music
Mass Communication
Media Communicaton
Scriptwriting
Jewellery Making
Pottery / sculpture making
Fine Arts

and such all housed under one large school. Where all the artists all over the world gather to exchange ideas, cultures, and new ways of being creative? Where it’s almost like an artist village where the elder artists come and share their knowledge and budding talents, live their life there, creating new works of arts, and inspire each other within? When will the government truly understand the core meaning of arts and design? How it’s overly lacking, and how businesses in order to improve from the limit it has reached now, is based on new ideas, new products, new ways of advertising, new creations? When will creative people truly find a place, that can keep them away from the crowd, and simply be in a world of their own, building their dreams?

2005-11-21T14:25:00.000+08:00

J bought me a Nano (black) last Thursday for our half year anniversary! She rushed to buy it before she picked me up, and had to torture herself going throught the night with me, without revealing anything about the gift she bought. Hehe.. I like it that she surprises me sweetly.

J, thanks for loving me this half year, thanks for being there for me, picking me up when I almost did not believe I would meet anyone who would love me honestly anymore..Living life with you for the past half year has taught me so much. Yet at the same time, I’ve learnt to realise that out differences are so minimal that it has been so easy fitting our lives together. You’ve been an excellent gf.

Saturday morning, I was throwing a little tantrum, dying to have more time with J away from all the constant client meetings, and so we went to catch COLD SHOWER in the theatres, as part of the French Film Festival. Then headed down to the Jazz Festival over at Club street. Started drinking since 7pm, and by 4am, I was dead drunk. 4 Finlandia Shots in a roll, sent even the best drinker in the group tipsy. Lol. And for the first time ever, both of us had to stagger into the cab, and leave the car parked there. Yes we were dead drunk.

Woke up Sunday morning, still blurred from the night before, wondering where the car went( chuckles).

But I remembered that on Saturday someone was questioning me about my work. Firstly she wasn’t being too professional with her comments, many were personal opinions about what she felt about the subject, and how she stereotyped the person, from the way she knew her. She knew nothing about marketing strategies and how advertising works. And sometimes it’s really painful having to explain yourself to someone who is as layman as that. Yet not explaining only makes you look like you have no idea what you are doing either. Such an ass.

And the lying, owe me money ex is getting on my nerves. Please pay up.
(no, me having a happy life now does not mean you can get away with not paying me what you owe.)

growls

2005-11-17T15:09:00.000+08:00

There's a stone on my back

I am not sure why, but I am beginning to feel my footsteps dragging feeling heavier. I am still excited about life, the stuffs I could do, but I am beginning to feel exhausted. I think I need a break to stop and think what I want in my life. To take a rest, so that I can walk a further distance from there on. To not wake up feeling like a dread everyday.

I think it’s time to do something about my life. To know where I should start packing. When I should say no to something that stops my life from moving on. Scrap things that lies around unoticeably yet inadvertably makes me unhappy. Take note of all the little cracks in my life.

Before I go on my planned sabbatical leave, I think it’s time I think about what I want for myself, and what I want for the future ahead. Somehow feel I am at a crossroad, and a lot of things I have in mind, doesn’t seem to be working out the way I see it to be. Its disappointing nevertheless, but I guess if its time to change any path, its time.

2005-11-16T16:10:00.000+08:00

Holiday in Bali
Our trip to Bali has been booked today! There was an offer on SQ flights to Bali, and we decided on it, since Koh Samui's into the monsoon season right now. Was really keen on Bali, being a sea sports lover, would love to be able to dive, snorkel, parasailing, rafting, jet skiing and more. Buy loads of bikinis, and bask in never ending sun! All sounds so droolicious already! We'll be out of town on the 26nov till the 30th Nov. Plus the fact that i finally found a gf who can enjoy sea sports with me, only goes to prove yes it's time to hit the beaches of Bali.

Carnival @ Club Street
There's a carnival happening at Club Street this saturday. The streets would be closed to traffic, and the pubs would open as early as 3pm for games, stalls, and simply a day of 'carnival events'. Basking and all. There would of course be promotions over at Club 95 So head on down with your friends, adorn some light clothes, and simply have fun!

Lmovie this thursday at Club95 : If walls could talk 2
Would you disregard peer pressure, to fight against them for what you truly feel and want? Would you keep on loving even if this love meant there would be no respect, no status, no recognition, no ownership of property, if your loved one was to pass away? Would you keep loving her then? And not regret chosing the path of the relationship? Would you agree on having a test tube baby, hold her hand and be next to her through the entire process, if she said she wanted a child, your child? Would you still take this path, even if you know life would be a tat harder, yet meaningful nevertheless?

I am looking into organising a music event
Yes looking for budding young talents or artists, who are interested in performing in front of a small group of people who are keen music lovers. Would be good if you have performing experience. Email me at cykomaniac@hotmail.com to know more details. Thanks!

2005-11-15T18:00:00.000+08:00

Remember America's Top models?
Its already the 5th cycle. And check out Kim in this episode. Hmmmmm...

2005-11-15T10:23:00.000+08:00

A Furry white morning

Whats more amazing then to be able to wake up on a rainy morning. your love one kisses you on your cheeks, followed by slurps from the white furry one. As you can tell, It’s been a good morning for me. Both my love sent me to work. Rudie was all frantic the moment I said goodbye to him, and he was looking out of the window almost like tears were welling up in his eyes, and couldn’t believe I was leaving him.

Then J messaged me, that even after they left, he was still looking out of the window, frantically searching through human crowds on the roadsides for a glimpse of me. Gosh. I miss him already...

Housemates going away, gonna have the entire house to ourselves this weekend! Cheerios!

2005-11-14T13:24:00.000+08:00

Weekend was all gone in one single wink

Friday - Beers and pool.
Saturday - Lunch with mom and meeting with 2 clients, friend's farewell.
Sunday - House moving / Garage Sale

All that moving of large boxes, heavy stuffs, made my body so tired, I was freaking grumpy the entire day. realised I am not too much in good health anymore. Too much smoking I presume.

That's my weekend alright. Gosh. Life's too short!

2005-11-10T11:34:00.000+08:00

The L'Oreal Luxury Products Division Sale is happening again.

17th Nov, Thursday, 12nn ˆ 7pm
18th Nov, Friday, 10am ˆ 6pm

3 Killiney Road, #06-07
Winsland House 1

Cash or Nets Only

There will be fantastic items from Lancôme, Biotherm, Shu Uemura, Helena Rubinstein and PCI fragrances & bath lines (eg Giorgio Armani, Polo Ralph Lauren, Cacheral and Drakka Noir), all at great savings!

2005-11-10T11:24:00.000+08:00

A 100 Years : Five for Fighting

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way
A family on my mind
I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star
15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
Half time goes by
Suddenly you’re wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...
I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you’re on your way
Every day's a new day...
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

2005-11-10T11:09:00.000+08:00

We are holding a Garage sale this Sunday at my rented place over at Chip Bee Gardens. The rent went up, so my landlady, ended the lease. We have some old bed frames, cupboards, shelves, clothes and stuffs going cheaply. Those who are interested may email me for the address. I will give you the details privately.

I’ve been bogged down by tonnes of ugly fugly work lately, the account servicing is really not doing us a favour but rather making life a little more miserable then expected.Some of the Account servicing people should go to art school. Gawd.

It’s november, and I can’t wait for Christmas to come, then we would be having holidays after holidays, fantastic. In the meantime, I’ve been planning stuffs in my life. Here’s what’s gotten lined up lately,

28Nov-2Dec : Deciding between Koh Samui and Bali trip.
3Dec : Full Day Yacht Trip
10Dec : Pre-christmas party @ whatcha (To be confirmed)
12Dec : Company Christmas Party

BTW, I want to dye my hair. I am sick of my hair. What colour would be good?

2005-11-09T19:26:00.000+08:00

Natalie Portman shaved her head

Also Natalie Portman Mohawk Pictures.

I know this is old news, but why would she want to shave her head like that? Seems she's going through a late rebel stage. But i like it. I like how she looks right now.

Requiem in Tibet

2005-11-07T16:27:00.000+08:00

Requiem in Tibet
Originally uploaded by submind.

Requiem in Tibet
There's a belief in sky burial in Tibet, where it is the offering of dismembered dead bodies to the hovering vultures in the sky, it is said that the offering of the body would help the dead to gain merits and virtues. And the vultures are called "holy eagles". This necklace is designed with the colours and textures that reminded me of Tibet. There are times in life, where you sometimes feel you just want to be away from the hustle of the crowd and the city life, and just be up in the 'holy mountains'. And sometimes you imagine being sacrificed into the skies, taking off, into freedom of the ever changing clouds, and into the sky...

Made with yellow Acrylic beads, and wooden beads, the weight is so light it's almost forgotten. I wanted the wearer to feel like they have been lfted off grounds, be free of worries, and feel light, away from burdens of life.

2005-11-07T14:21:00.000+08:00

Launch of new BCBG Campaign

I love that redhead girl's hair. Always have a fetish for such doll look. The colour's great too. heh. Makes me feel i really should do something about my fugly, dry, wiry, fucked up hair. Haha.. it's time to hit the salon. Any great salons to recommend? Wanna do hair colour.

2005-11-07T13:48:00.000+08:00

Are you guys Design whores like me?

While everyone's raving about how the latest Nokia N70 is one of the most advanced phone anyone can own right now, which i was one of them, just two days ago, and today, looking at the website, Miss P recommended to me, I was all bought over by the new crazy design Nokia has come up with again. Loved the new gold, and the 'leathery' backing look they have no created. For one, i really hate silver coloured phones. How can they be so sinfully boring, when so many different designs can be used on them? Being a Nokia Suede phone surpporter, I was all thrown into the deciding factor of looks in regards to its technology. Which also explans why i never quite own the most hi-tech phones to be found in the market. The reason is simple.

I am superficial.

2005-11-04T18:34:00.000+08:00

How much would you do for the sake of love?

In this era, we humans have progressed to be very frank in our expressions of love. When we meet friends we love, we do a check to cheek side kiss. When we meet close friends, we do a tight bear hug. When we meet our lovers, we meet with a kiss on our lips and a mega hug in the middle of public. And how many I love yous has been said over big screens in movies, convincing many that its the cool line to say once in a dating game? So how many of us actually mean it when we say it?

Watching people around me fall in and out of love, I’ve stopped to think. How much do we really love? And how much would we really do for the sake of love? Like the wise men said, its always the actions that says more then words.

Would you wait and be there for someone you love who happens to be going through a divorce? We all know it can be very mentally and emotionally draining for someone who’s going through the process of it for three years. Could you be there, next to the person you love, hold his / her hands, understand the trauma, and listen to their cries? lend them your shoulders and love the person under such circumstances where he / she is still not totally just yours?

Would you be able to arrange for a threesome, for your girlfriend/boyfriend, if he /she is sexually attracted / is interested in someone else? Or in some cases, bored of you? Would you be able to stand sharing someone you love, as a way of keeping her?

On the same note, would you be able to allow your girlfriend / boyfriend to have another partner, just cause that’s what makes her happy, and you continue to love him / her, with no grumbles?
Would you have been able to bear that pain of seeing him / her dress up to date someone else, and allow it? Slowly let your heart bleed?

Would you accept someone who is married with a kid, and love him / her unconditionally, educate and feed the kid for them, like your very own? Would you be able to work harder, spend less cause you love him / her and the kid?

Would you allow lay in bed, with your partner, while he / she is holding someone else in their arms? Patting the person to sleep? While you tear in silence and say nothing of the situation? Would you still think to yourself that you are willing to forgive, and continue loving?

These were the more drastic cases of ‘I love you(s)’ that I have seen. All these were to me much more painful ways of loving then commiting suicide for love. I do not think these were the best, and most intellectual way of showing your love, but I must agree, that I may not even be able to the same myself.

So how much have you loved?

The Final Requiem : Halloween @ 95

2005-11-02T10:48:00.000+08:00

The Final Requiem : Halloween @ 95
Originally uploaded by submind.

I waited for Halloween till blard oozed from my eyes, nose, and mouth. Be afraid, be very afraid....

(Taken with friend's Sony Ericsson phone, which has proved to be not very good. lol*)

Do Not Erase Me

2005-10-31T19:23:00.000+08:00

Do Not Erase Me
Originally uploaded by submind.

Do Not Erase Me.
Do Not Disregard Me.

To accuse me of anything less
would be like accusing rain of falling down.

Smoking Project : 02

2005-10-31T18:00:00.000+08:00

Smoking Project : 02
Originally uploaded by submind.

Another one of my images from the Smoking Project. The experiment of capturing the still motion of smoke.

The motion of smoke has always intrigued me, i can watch my cigarette burn for a long time, simply staring at the smoke as it swirls up into the staleness of the air. Travels for a little distance, before it starts to disappear......

Sometimes our lives are like the smoke swirls, sometimes unoticeable, but its how people stop to admire, and appreciate it. Before it disappears, in a mere second.

Take time to appreciate the little bits of life around you. your love ones, your favourite smells. The sounds, close your eyes, and absorb. You'll learn to treasure more in life.

2005-10-28T15:41:00.000+08:00

New Music to my playlist
1. Bebel Gilberto : Remixed
2. James Blunt : Back to Bedlam
3. Jack Johnson : In Between Dreams
4. Morcheeba : Antidote
5. GoldFrapp : Supernature

Fiona Apple's new album's released. hmmm *rubs hands in glee*

2005-10-27T14:57:00.000+08:00

I think I found a duplicate of me.

There’s been incidences where she looks at me, and knows if she was me, she would have done the same. And I’ve also gotten images in my head, that knows what she’s gonna do for me. Cause that would be the exact same thing I would do, if I was her. The effect’s pretty paranomal. I’ve been eyeing this white nike bag for a long time, and yesterday, she was at a meeting, yet I had this image in my head that she might just walk into the store and buy it for me. And there it was in the boot of her van in the evening.

And that moment you think to yourself. Omigawd. Can anyone know you better then that? Snap. And there it is. Then she proceeds to show me other stuffs she bought for me. And I was impressed. She knew my eye makeup remover, my contact lens lotion were finishing. Even I myself couldn’t remember that! I was so ashamed of myself. There’s been more then a few instances, that I wake up and think to myself.... wow.

She deserves to be loved.